Saturday, April 9, 2016

Attachment to Suffering.

This phrase is from Natalie Goldberg's True Secret of Writing I wasn't sure what to think of it, but it must have caught my attention in some way because I wrote it down.

"Attachment to suffering." Suffering seems attached to me. All that's happened. I'm disabled with a son who is disabled. I have awful memories. I have dreams or flashbacks sometimes.

I do see how suffering (even, say, endometriosis pain) can become part of one's identity--even most of one's identity. That can easily happen to me with bipolar disorder. The struggles are part of me, but I can't let them become me.

If I could somehow "unattach," what would happen? What would I have to do? What would I grab onto instead? Contentment, quiet, learning, my family (as whole individuals), friendship, love?

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